I struggled all my life to have a ‘normal’ relationship with food and came to Scott with a 40-year history of chronic eating-disorder symptoms. Despite decades of therapy, during which I could maintain a normal, healthy weight; all was still not “right” or “healthy” with my body image and the way my daily thoughts revolved around dieting. I lived my life at the mercy of the latest diet; and worse, I thought I was just a “nobody” because I could not stay on that diet to get that ‘gorgeous fitness-model’ body I kept seeing in magazines and on stage. I was VERY unhappy and frustrated with myself, and blamed all of my life’s failures directly on my inability to stay on a diet.
I have been working with Scott for seven months now, still have a long way to go, but am so grateful for his coaching. Scott wasted no time to tell me flat out how going on another diet was just another futile attempt to avoid looking at ME, my emotions, and my own brain power. My food and diets obsessions were mere symptoms of my emotional immaturity, zero sense of self, and a smoke screen for years of hurt and bottled-up anger. In order to heal myself inside, I had to let go of the dieting mask I had hung onto all my life. Scott told me I would NEVER ever have peace within myself if I kept living through diets and fitness competitions. I had to let go of that “wall”
Letting go of my food obsession has by no means been easy. But with Scott’s coaching and my persistence, I can now see how my world looks without the mask of “being on a diet.” I really had no idea what resources and abilities I had inside of myself to make decisions and become aware of all the uncomfortable, conflicting emotions I had lurking inside of myself.
I see how I am NOT defined by the diet I am on, a number on a scale, or my body-fat percentage. My goals no longer center on losing a certain number of pounds by a certain date, or how my body looks compared to that of a fitness competitor. My goals and aspirations have more to do with connecting on a deeper level with my own sense of self, and with family and friends. I measure my growth not by a score or a ‘look,’ but by a certain peace of mind, self-respect, as well as by how I relate to those who are close to me.
I am discovering all of my God-given talents and ability to solve problems without over-reacting to external circumstances that don’t go my way, or that remind me of my destructive past. I DO NOT need to be controlled by food, by diet, nor do I need to hang on to, or over-dramatize my emotions linked to external circumstances, i.e., people, places, and things.
I am learning to respect my body and its physique with its unique strengths. Better yet, I am learning to see and accept who I really am inside, and respect my feelings and the journey I am now on to better myself.